


snow

by chaelattes



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Florist Hyungwon, Fluff, I don’t know what else to tag, M/M, broken up joohyuk, hyungwon doesn’t like winter, kihyun just wants him to be okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-09-02 19:56:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,503
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16793719
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaelattes/pseuds/chaelattes
Summary: his hair reminded him of winter, it was as white as snow.





	snow

**Author's Note:**

  * For [wonnietv (heoneybee)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/heoneybee/gifts).



> happy late birthday present ruberry ;-; love you lots, I hope you enjoy this

Hyungwon was awoken from the sound of his alarm. He let out a small groan and reluctantly pulled himself out of bed; moving the duvet aside. As soon as he got up, he was suddenly met with a cold breeze. He already missed the warmth from his bed.

He felt something nudging against his leg suddenly and then looked down; seeing his cat looking right up at him. “Oh, Angel. You’re awake too?” His lips curved into a small smile as he leaned down to pet her, and then he went to the window so he could close it.

He rubbed his hands together in an attempt to warm himself up, before going over to the bathroom to wash his face. He looked at himself in the mirror and let out a small sigh as he noticed that his dark circles seemed more visible now than before. “No amount of sleep will ever fix this after all.” He muttered to himself.

Hyungwon has been having some trouble sleeping for a long time now. The trauma of past events has been keeping him up — it would either take him a lot of time until he actually falls asleep, or he would just end up not sleeping at all. His therapist explained that this whole thing may have been caused because he’s been holding his feelings about those events inside for so long, and suggested that he should talk to someone — other than her, about it. She assured him that it would lift a lot of weight off his shoulders. He did consider it a few times, but he was also a little unsure. There wasn’t really anyone around him that he trusted, or felt close enough to for him to actually feel comfortable talking about his feelings.

He got himself ready before going downstairs to put his jacket on, and then he got his keys out; unlocking the door before stepping outside — immediately regretting it.

There was frost forming on the windows of people’s houses, on the ground, on the cars that were parked up, it was everywhere. Hyungwon noticed small patches of white on the ground, but it wasn’t frost. These were dissolving into the ground. He tilted his head up slightly to look at the sky, and then scrunched his nose as he felt something falling onto the tip of it.

Snow. It was snowing.

He bit onto his lower lip and wrapped his arms around himself, digging his fingers into his jacket. Making sure that he was careful with each step he took, he made his way over to his car and quickly got inside. Once he was in, he quickly turned the aircon on with warm air. It was as if it was getting colder and colder each second. Despite the warm air now making contact with his skin, it didn’t do very much. In fact, it only reminded him of how much he hated the cold, the snow, — how much he hated winter.

Hyungwon put his gloves on and placed his hands onto the steering wheel; giving it a small squeeze before starting the car up and driving off.

He didn’t usually drive this slowly, and he was getting very irritated with all the other drivers horning at him — he was just being careful, knowing that the ground was covered with a thin sheet of frost, and now about to be filled with layers of snow.

Once he finally got to work, Hyungwon carefully parked his car and got out, closing the door and then locking the car. He made his way over to the building and stepped inside; letting out a small sigh as he was immediately hit with a wave of warmth. He was greeted by Kihyun, who looked up at him with a small frown. “Hyungwonnie, you’re late again. Did you oversleep?”

Hyungwon furrowed his brows in confusion after hearing the word ‘late’, and then took a glance at his watch. It was 12:50. He was supposed to be in for 10 today.

“But my alarm woke me up! I swear the time was set right.” It was Hyungwon’s turn to frown, and he looked away as the embarrassment began to settle in. With the way Kihyun was, Hyungwon had always assumed that he would get a good scolding from him at least once each day, and that he’d be the one that he would get on the least with. But to his surprise, Kihyun turned out to be the most understanding of all, and the person who he became the closest to. Instead of shouting at him for everything he did, Kihyun was very gentle and took his time when explaining things to him. He’d also nag him about everything all the time, and it made Hyungwon feel like a child sometimes, but it was nice to have someone looking out for him.

“Maybe you just forgot that the clocks have gone an hour back. It’s okay. But forget that for now, how is your condition? Are you still struggling to sleep?” Kihyun asked, now moving his gaze to the dark circles under Hyungwon’s eyes. He was one of the other people who knew about it, but Hyungwon never told him why it was happening.

“Yeah. I didn’t stay up for the whole night this time. It just took me some time to fall asleep.” Hyungwon mumbled, while pulling his coat off. “It’s okay, don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine, it’s just something I need to deal with on my own. I’ll keep you updated though, so please don’t worry, okay?”

Kihyun remained quiet for a while and just stared at the other. It really upset him to see Hyungwon in such a state, and he really wished that he could help somehow. “If you ever need anything, don’t hesitate to send me a text or give a call, okay? You know I’d stop everything just to help you.”

Hyungwon’s lips curved into a faint smile and he nodded his head in response. “I know. Now, let’s go, I think I’ve held you back long enough.” He let out a small laugh and Kihyun lightly hit him on the shoulder.

“Not funny. You can talk to me you know, I’ll always listen to you.” Kihyun grabbed Hyungwon’s arm and quickly led him to the till. “This customer was asking for you. Give me your stuff, I’ll put them away.”

“I know. But not at wor—“ Before Hyungwon could finish, he was already being dragged to the front. He hummed softly and gave his things to Kihyun, before looking for the customer he mentioned. He caught a glimpse of Changkyun in the corner sorting out the flowers. Once they made eye contact, the younger pointed over to the customer and Hyungwon nodded, before walking in that direction. “Uhm, excuse me, you asked for me?”

The customer turned around with a small smile and nodded his head. “I haven’t been here in a while, you weren’t around and I refused to be served by anyone other than you.”

Hyungwon immediately recognised him.

This boy was a regular, he came by quite often. Hyungwon had served him on many occasions, and it seemed that the boy was so pleased with his customer service that he started coming by more often, always asking about Hyungwon. They started talking a lot more after that and became somewhat closer, but not enough for Hyungwon to consider them friends. The boy looked different from when he last saw him though, and that was when he looked up and noticed his hair. It was white. As white as snow.

Hyungwon was feeling a little strange now and he had no idea why, but he chose to ignore it. “I’m sorry Jooheon, a lot was happening and I needed time off to sort things out. I’ll be here now though, so you can keep coming back again.”

Jooheon laughed and nodded his head in agreement. Hyungwon really enjoyed seeing the younger smile, his eyes formed crescents and sparkled like a starry night sky, little dimples would appear in his cheeks, and the sound of his laugh was like music to his ears.

“I hope you’re alright now, I was very concerned. I felt bad for constantly asking about you every time I came here, but I had no other choice since I’m not in contact with you.”

“It’s alright, I probably should have said something first. But I didn’t think that you’d be so concerned about me... I’m sorry.” Hyungwon muttered, now lowering his gaze.

“What do you mean? We are friends, aren’t we? You disappeared so suddenly and I thought something really bad happened. But you’re here now, that’s all that matters. I’m really happy to see you again.”

Hyungwon started biting onto his lower lip out of nervousness and fiddled with the end of his sleeve. He couldn’t ignore how guilty he felt for not only making Jooheon worry so much, but also for not even considering the younger as a friend to him. He felt horrible, and he wanted to make it up to Jooheon somehow. “I’m happy to see you too, and I’m sorry again, I really am. Would you like to meet up after my shift ends maybe? At the cafe across the road?”

Jooheon hummed and nodded his head once more. “Sure, I don’t see why not. We have a lot to catch up on.” He grinned and patted Hyungwon shoulder playfully.

“Yeah, I guess we do. Ah, right, what can I assist you with?” Hyungwon mumbled; feeling a little embarrassed for not asking that sooner.

“Hm, no. I just wanted to see you. I’m sorry, I took up so much of your time from dealing with customers who actually need help.” Jooheon frowned, and then looked away.

“No, no. it’s fine. I’m glad you came. So, see you later then?” Hyungwon said, smiling shyly.

“Yeah, see you later~”

*******

“Oi! Chae Hyungwon!”

Hyungwon stopped where he was and let out a small sigh, before turning around to face Minhyuk. “How may I be of service to you, Mister Lee?” He muttered sarcastically.

Minhyuk scoffed, and then pointed to his watch. “Your shift finishes at 5:30, doesn’t it? You still have 30 minutes. Where are you off to?”

“I asked Kihyun if I could leave earlier, and he allowed it. I have some place to be.” Hyungwon turned around to leave, but he was stopped as Minhyuk grabbed his arm.

“You aren’t going to do something stupid, are you? Please. Don’t.” Minhyuk pleaded, his lips curving into a small frown.

“I’m going with Jooheon.”

“J-Jooheon?”

Hyungwon bit his lip as he noticed the sudden fall in the older’s expression. He almost wanted to change his response to prevent Minhyuk from worrying — there was clearly something that he didn’t know about, but he chose not to press on it. “Yeah. Are you okay with that?”

“It’s fine. Just go.” Minhyuk muttered, now averting his gaze.

“Thank you.” Hyungwon put his jacket on and swung his bag over his shoulder, before walking out. Though, he couldn’t help but wonder why Minhyuk had such a reaction. He made a mental note to ask Jooheon about it later.

He made his way over to his car and got inside, turning the warm air on from the aircon before driving back home. Thankfully, the snow wasn’t too much at the moment and some of the frost had melted away, so it didn’t take him long to get back. Once he was there, he rushed into his house and went upstairs to get ready. He got out of his work clothes and looked around for what he could wear; deciding to pull out whatever seemed decent. After that, he went downstairs and took a quick glance at the clock. “It’s still a bit early.” Hyungwon muttered to himself, and then looked down as he heard a small meow.

“I’m sorry baby, I’ve neglected you so much, haven’t I?” He carefully lifted the feline into his arms and nuzzled his nose into her fur, before pressing a kiss above her nose. At that moment, his phone started ringing. Keeping a strong hold onto his cat with one arm, he used his free hand to reach for his phone; bringing it to his ear.

- _Hello?_

- _Hyung!_

_-Jooheon?_

_-Hi! Before you ask,_ _Changkyun gave_ _your number to me._

_-That’s alright, it’s not as if he gave it to a stranger. Is everything okay?_

_-Yeah, I just wanted to change the plan, if you don’t mind. Could I come to your house instead?_

_-But you don’t even know where I live._

_-You can give me the address then!_

_-It’s freezing cold out here though. Do you want me to pick you up?_

_\- I’ll be fine! Don’t worry. But are you really sure you’re okay with me coming over?_

_-Yeah. I want to see you._

_-O-Oh? I want to see you too. I’m gonna hang up now, Okay?_

_-Okay, see you soon. Bye._

After Jooheon hung up, Hyungwon shoved his phone back into his pocket and then went to sit on the couch, before placing the feline onto his lap. He brushed his fingers through the smooth fur and smiled as he heard her purring. A few minutes passed and the doorbell rang. Hyungwon gently moved his cat to the side before standing up and making his way to the door; opening it once he got there. “You really came.”

“You thought I wouldn’t?” Jooheon grinned, and then stepped forward after Hyungwon moved to the side to let him in.

“I guess. It was just a bit unexpected. Anyway, you can hang your stuff up there.” Hyungwon mumbled, before going back to the living room — where he was immediately greeted with loud meows and nudges to his leg. “You’re so clingy today.” He smiled and held the feline again; letting her brush her tongue against his nose. It felt like sandpaper being rubbed against his skin, but he didn’t mind.

Jooheon couldn’t hold back his smile as he heard the affectionate tone lacing through Hyungwon’s voice while he spoke to his cat. It was cute.

He followed the older into the living room and stood beside him, peeking over at the feline — who just narrowed her gaze at him and stared for a while, before leaning over Hyungwon’s shoulder so she could paw at his cheek.

“I’m sorry, I don’t really have many people around that often, so she’s a little curious. Want to hold her?” Hyungwon offered, looking back at the younger with a small smile.

Jooheon just nodded his head and carefully brought the feline into his arms, before moving his free hand to caress her fur. “She’s so soft, and her fur is as white as snow.” Hyungwon flinched upon hearing the word ‘snow’, which caused Jooheon to look at him with a confused expression. “When you saw my hair earlier, you had the same reaction. Are you okay?”

“I— I’m fine. It’s just that I had a traumatic experience with snow in the past, so even when I hear the word, I do that.”

“Do you want to talk about it? Only if you’re comfortable with it, of course.”

The therapist’s words repeated in Hyungwon’s head. — _If you talk to someone other than me about it, it might make you feel better. It’ll take a lot of weight off from your shoulders._ — Maybe he should. He should also tell Kihyun too. It’s unfair that him and Jooheon worry so much about him and are being left in the dark about what the problem really is.

“Okay, let’s sit down.” Hyungwon mumbled, now making his way over to the couch. The feline jumped from Jooheon’s arms and she immediately ran over to her owner, making herself comfortable by curling onto his lap. Jooheon smiled at that and came to sit beside Hyungwon. 

“Don’t pressure yourself. You don’t have to tell me.” Jooheon whispered softly, before reaching out for Hyungwon’s hand and giving it a small squeeze.

“It’s fine.” Hyungwon nodded his head and then smiled faintly at Jooheon to reassure him. “It was snowing and I was playing outside with my supposed ‘friends’. They wanted to play a game which involved them covering me with snow. Of course, I didn’t think much of it and agreed. It was fun at first, b-but they...” Hyungwon trailed off and bit his lip as he felt his eyes watering.

Jooheon noticed this and brushed his thumb over Hyungwon’s hand, but before he could say anything, the older continued. “They told me to close my eyes and kept putting snow on me, even covering my face with it. I told them I couldn’t breathe, but they didn’t listen. More snow fell from the tree above me and I-I guess that freaked them out, so they ran off and left me behind. Just as I thought this was it for me, I felt something digging through the snow.”

After saying that, Hyungwon pointed to his cat. Jooheon’s eyes widened in shock. “She saved you?”

“Kind of? She just dug up the snow and I made my own way out. I know it’s nothing big, but if it wasn’t for her, I would’ve died. She kept following me around after that day, so I decided to take her in.” Hyungwon looked down at the feline and smiled as she nudged her head into his hand.

Jooheon remained quiet for a while as he tried to process everything he just heard. As he began making connections, he finally understood everything. “So, is that why you have trouble sleeping? I’ve noticed that you always get this way whenever winter comes around.”

Hyungwon nodded and let out a small sigh. “Yes, exactly. I’m too scared to close my eyes, and even if I do somehow fall asleep, once I realise I quickly get up and I can’t go back to sleep again. It’s still happens other times too, I get scared that someone might try to suffocate me in my sleep, but it gets worse around winter.”

“I see. But how were you so confident in telling me? I’m sure it isn’t something easy to talk about.” Jooheon started rubbing his thumb over Hyungwon’s hand again, before giving it another squeeze. 

“You’re right, it isn’t. Originally, I only told Kihyun, but I didn’t mention exactly what happened because I didn’t want him to worry more than he already was. I told you because I felt comfortable enough to, and my therapist told me that I should tell someone other than her about it. I’m going to tell Kihyun tomorrow too, he deserves to know.” Hyungwon looked down at their hands and his cheeks reddened a little, then he hesitantly met the younger’s gaze.

Jooheon simply hummed in response and looked at Hyungwon; staring into those beautiful brown orbs. He was getting butterflies, and his heart was pounding against his chest — it was the exact same feeling he got when he met him for the first time. He slowly leaned closer, pressing a small kiss onto Hyungwon’s lips. They were soft and plump, and they reminded him of rose petals. 

Hyungwon flinched and Jooheon was pulled out of his thoughts; quickly moving back. “I-I’m sorry, it’s something Minhyuk hyung used to do to calm me down. I thought it would help.”

_Minhyuk. He almost forgot to ask Jooheon about that._

“It’s okay, I liked it. I-I mean— can I ask you something first?” Hyungwon couldn’t even look at Jooheon anymore, he was too embarrassed — and yet he still kept a tight grip onto the younger’s hand.

“S-Sure, what is it?” Jooheon asked, seeming slightly worried.

“So, as I was leaving work, I was stopped by Minhyuk and he asked where I was off to. As soon as I mentioned your name, he started acting strange. Did something happen between you two? I’m sorry, you don’t have to tell me, I’m just curious since I’ve never seen him like that before.”

“Oh. Well, you might have made that connection already, but Minhyuk hyung and I used to be a thing. It was nice for a while, but then he became distant all of a sudden and I didn’t understand why. He never told me anything and I was fed up of it, so I broke things off. Later on, I discovered that half way during our relationship, he developed feelings for you.” Jooheon mumbled, using his free hand to rub his nape awkwardly. 

“W-What? But why didn’t he say anything? I didn’t think it was that. I thought you did something bad.” Hyungwon frowned, feeling a little bad for making such an assumption.

Jooheon let out a small laugh and shook his head. “No, I’m not a bad person, I promise. He probably didn’t say anything because he felt bad, and he might’ve been worried about you seeing me because he thought I might tell you everything and make him look bad.”

“I don’t think he’s bad but, he really should’ve told you. It hurts more when you find out yourself.” 

“Yeah, it does. It’s fine though. It’s over and done with now. But you know what’s strange? I ended up falling for the same person he fell for. Do you have some sort of power that makes people fall in love you?” Jooheon joked, lightly patting Hyungwon’s shoulder. 

Hyungwon’s cheeks reddened again and he shook his head. “N-No— but wait, what did you say just now? You like me?”

“I— uh— I have for a while now. There was just something about you which stood out to me. After the moment we first met, I wanted to see you again, so I kept coming by. Even after I found out you were the Hyungwon that Minhyuk hyung fell for, my feelings never changed. But for a long time you stopped coming and I was really worried, I assumed you ran away because you thought I was some sort of stalker.” Jooheon laughed again before letting out a small sigh. “Yeah. I like you.” 

“O-Okay. What if I told you that I like you too?” Hyungwon blurted out, and then quickly averted his gaze.

Jooheon paused. “Oh? Here I was, preparing myself for rejection and you just say that.”

“You don’t seem to be too happy about it.” Hyungwon teased, smiling slightly.

“No! Hyung! Of course I’m happy! I’m over the moon!” Jooheon jumped up and waved his arms around excitedly to prove his point, but Hyungwon dragged him back down and placed a finger onto his lips, before pointing to his cat. He forgot she was asleep. “Sorry.” He whispered with a slight frown. 

“I was just teasing.” Hyungwon gently placed his cat onto the pillow on the side before pulling the younger into his arms. Jooheon smiled and shifted closer to him, before nuzzling his nose against his neck affectionately.

“Hyung, when did you start liking me? It’s okay if you don’t know, I’m just curious.” Jooheon asked, looking up at the other with a small smile.

“I didn’t actually realise until a few months later, since I don’t really pay attention to these things. I always felt warm and fuzzy from inside whenever you came, but I never knew why. I brushed it off, just thinking that it was something else, but it kept happening. It was a confusing experience.” Hyungwon mumbled, fidgeting with his sleeve.

“That’s cute. I didn’t think you’d be the oblivious type.” Jooheon reached out for Hyungwon’s hand, moving it away from his sleeve and holding onto it. “Are you okay?” He asked softly, before leaning his head onto the older’s shoulder.

Hyungwon stiffened and averted his gaze. “I-It’s just— you’re very... affectionate? I’m sorry, it’s not that I don’t like it, I’m just not used to it. The people I’ve been with before weren’t really like this. A-Anyway, do you want something to eat? A Drink? I should’ve done that first, I’m such a horrible host.” He mumbled, quickly getting up and running over to the kitchen.

Jooheon frowned and stood up, before following Hyungwon. As the older was busy trying to make something, he wrapped his arms around his middle and rested his head onto his back. “It’s okay, hyung. I don’t want anything, I just want to be with you. Besides, I heard that you can’t cook.” He mumbled, looking up at the other and sticking his tongue out slightly.

“Hey! I’m learning! But are you sure? I don’t want you to feel hungry. Did you even eat before?” Hyungwon turned around and cupped Jooheon’s cheeks, brushing his thumbs over them gently.

“You worry too much, I promise it’s fine. If I get hungry I’ll just eat you instead.” Jooheon’s lips curved into a small grin.

“Ah— I don’t think I’ll taste very nice though.” Hyungwon scoffed, and then leaned forward to rub his nose against Jooheon’s. “Cheeky. I love you.”

“I love you too.” Jooheon wrapped his arms around Hyungwon’s shoulders and rested his head onto his chest; closing his eyes. “Sleepy...”

“Me too. Should we take a nap?” Hyungwon suggested, pressing a kiss onto Jooheon’s hair.

“Mhm... can I stay over? I don’t want to leave you.” Jooheon asked; the tiredness evident in his voice.

Hyungwon was a little surprised at the question, but he had no intention of refusing. “Uh, sure. My bed is big enough... I-I mean we don’t have to do that! You could sleep somewhere el—“

Jooheon pressed his finger onto Hyungwon’s lips and let out a small laugh. “That’s fine, hyung. Lead the way.”

Hyungwon simply hummed in response and moved back, taking Jooheon’s hand before making his way upstairs to his room. Once they were there, Hyungwon immediately ran to his bed and slipped beneath the covers; letting out a content sigh. “Nice and warm... come here, Heonie.”

Jooheon’s cheeks reddened a little at the nickname and he shyly laid down beside Hyungwon; shifting closer to him for warmth. He wrapped his arms around him again and nuzzled his nose into his neck, pressing a few kisses there as well.

Hyungwon brought his hand up to brush his fingers through Jooheon’s bright white hair, and he pressed a kiss onto his forehead. Before he could even say anything, he heard light snoring noises and looked down, only to see that Jooheon had fallen asleep. He smiled to himself and used his free hand to rub the younger’s back, occasionally tracing circles onto it with his finger. “Sleep well, honey bee.” 

He spent most of the time just watching Jooheon as he slept, since he was certain that tonight was going to be one of those nights, but after a while he started feeling a little tired. He turned slightly to look at the window; it was still snowing. His eyes began to close and he eventually drifted off to sleep with a small smile on his face.

_Now he had something good to remember this season with._


End file.
